School started for our boy and were so excited! Admittedly Hal and I were mainly terrified, which is how we like to approach most things, lets face it. Always panicked with every new milestone or change to the normal day to day, at least that’s how i would describe us.

Aydin was all excitement thursday and friday and reports back were that he was doing well. So much for my endless list of worries! Which ranged from not wanting me to leave, not going to the loo alone, not listening, not eating, not being nice to others etc etc etc time 1000!

Now 5th day down and the novelity of school is wearing off. Today he was clinging and begging me to stay kick in mummy guilt! I really hope this will pass and routine will take over, lets face it he loves routine.

On a plus side Aydis teacher was assessing the class today on their phonics and numbers and Aydi rather than going through the letters phonetically read all the teachers guide so his teacher didnt even bother continuing. Then with the numbers they had to stop him counting as he just kept going!

Unfortunately, though they were impressed with his skills they were concerned that he likes to wonder away when bored so they invited me in for a chat. So not sure what that will bring up!

But for now, look how grown up he looks, makes me feel so many extremes of emotion that i have only experienced since becoming a mum. Prior to motherhood i had no idea you could feel so ecstatically proud and happy but so overwhelming sad and pained in one breath. Sad that they grow up so fast that you have no control over that and those glimpses of them being grown up and things changing is so terrifying and sad becuase this bit is so wonderful and they are so innocent and amazing! I love him so intensely and fiercely no one could have prepared me for this intensity of emotions. When i think i can’t possibly be more into him he does something else that blows me away and like this we have arrived at this fantastic, intelligent 4 year old who will undoubtedly squeeze out more love from my heart which i never imagined could exist.